Lapse, relapse and recovery

Part of recovery is relapse. It's almost expected. At some point, after things have gotten better, they'll probably get worse again. The truth is, though, that your attitude towards relapses will have a big impact on how you handle them and whether you can use them to grow.

   

Witthaya Phonsawat/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

First of all, a relapse can be many things. It might be returning to substance abuse or self-injurious behaviors. It can also be falling into another depressive episode or having obsessive thoughts again. It is an increase in symptoms that you have previously managed to reduce.

Then there's the definition of relapse. Some people think that any step backwards is a "relapse." The thing is, there is a difference between a lapse and a relapse. A lapse is engaging in a behavior or experiencing an increase in symptoms. Lapses happen to the best of us. They are not the same as a relapse, which is a series of lapses that put you back into the state of illness you were in before.


Some mindsets, such as that of Alcoholics Anonymous and other groups in that tradition, say that a lapse means you're back at day one. This can be very discouraging. But it's not the only way to view it. A lapse can be a learning experience. It tells you about what triggers your symptoms and what your areas of weakness are. This allows you to become stronger in your recovery.

If you experience a lapse, don't give up and give in. Messing up once or having a bad day doesn't mean you have to start over. It doesn't mean you're having a relapse. It just means that you now know what you need to work on. Resist the urge to fall back into old patterns. Take the time to think and maybe journal about what happened and why. Share these thoughts with your therapist, who can help you come up with strategies to avoid similar pitfalls in the future.

Sometimes lapses do add up, though, and become a relapse. While not ideal, this is perfectly normal. But if you could become better once, you can do it again. Stay open and honest with your therapist and support system. If you are struggling, let someone know. It is easier to get back on track with someone cheering you on. Keeping secrets is a sign of trouble.

Every day you spend free of destructive behaviors or symptoms of illness should be celebrated. Whether or not all of those days are in a row is secondary. Each time you make the choice to be healthy, you are right to be proud of yourself. Whether you had a single lapse or are in a full relapse, recovery is still an option. Life has lots of ups and downs. It's what you do with them that matters.


What has your experience been with lapses and relapses? What keeps you on track towards recovery? Share your thoughts in the comments.